Еще про асексуальность

[enot06]

С русского сайта асексуалов - девушка из Швеции ищет партнера:

I want an asexual relationship=without sex, but with hugs. So I want no sex whatsoever, but nice, friendly company and a hug now and then. If the person is cuddly that's good, I'm cuddly. But I can be flexible if the other one doesn't like physical contact that much.

I am first and foremost looking for a man. Since I don't want sex anyway, I could theoretically live with a woman. But I only fall in love with men.

Why not Russia? Asexual men are so rare I have to search everywhere for them.
------------
I am asexual, female, and 31 years old. I am searching for romance or marriage.

Ничем не хуже любых других объявлений о знакомствах. Девушка как девушка, ищет свое женское счастье.

Это вдогонку azbukivedi, которая призывает обсуждать проблему, а не прятаться в кусты. Не прячутся, а прямо говорят, чего им надо - и чего не надо.

Comments

[azbukivedi.livejournal.com]

Что ж, по крайней мере честно. Архипелаг им гуд лак...

[enot.livejournal.com]

Честно. Эта шведка в себе разобралась.
Но можно допустить, что девушка вышла замуж, не зная о такой своей особенности, не думая об этом как до брака, так и в браке? Католическая школа едва ли предлагает sexual ed.

[lierre.livejournal.com]

sigh...

[enot.livejournal.com]

My post was in response to someone triggering a very heated discussion - the author described one of her affairs with a man married to a frigid woman (both Catholics). He was overjoyed to see that his lover (the author) had multi-orgazmes while his wife never made him happy. I think she is very opinionated - it was stated in the course of discussion that women disinterested in sex should admit it and seek treatment.

My lj is public, I screened your comment just in case.

[lierre.livejournal.com]

It's ok if it's public, I think I'm "out of the closet," I just don't rub it in everyone's face like some people feel the need to do!

it was stated in the course of discussion that women disinterested in sex should admit it and seek treatment.

I thought about that for a long, long, long time... but that would be like "seeking treatment" for being gay or lesbian. If you do not WISH to be sexual, feel a need for it, it wouldn't be treatment, because nothing is wrong. Your partner wanting you to do it is no justification.

I'd feel a lot closer to the GLBT community if asexuality were acknowledged, it's still not really.

Sorry, that was why my sigh, the topic is touchy.

[enot.livejournal.com]

I guessed about your sigh.

I think GLBT is all about sexuality. Asexuality is something different, I don't think GLBT people could understand it any easier than straight.
I think that there is nothing abnormal in asexuality lasting for periods of time. And I do UNDERSTAND that some people are built these way, so for them it will last for life. I guess in this case one doesn't feel anything is wrong, one has nothing to compare to (can't compare to movies or novels, right).
The author of the original post (a woman) insists that women must change themselves for the sake of their husbands. She never had problems whatsoever, so her compassion goes to men deprived of good sex. There is another discussion looking at the situation from a differen angle - how men should "wake-up" sexual interest in thier partners.
Well, I know what I disliked about the post I repsonded to - the author offers ultimate advice - no options given - to all female population. It's kind of pressing her point of view.

[azbukivedi.livejournal.com]

Ещё как можно. Мужа жалко в такой ситуации.

[dmpogo.livejournal.com]

Na samom dele w toj diskussi pro zhalko muzhej, odin poworot ne prozwuchal:

Sobstwenno mnogie mouzhchiny, dazhe w pechali ot otgranicehnnosti seksual'nogo opyta, sowsem ne objazatel'no zainteresowany w poluchenii ego ot zheny. Ne zamechali, u worot publichnogo doma wse eshe ne stojat tolpy zhenihoh ?

Pri polozhitel'noj intepretacii - mozhno dostatochno ljubit' swoju zhenu chtobu ne zastawljat' ee wypolnjat' wse swoi prihoti (a prihotjam granic net)

Pri bolee tradicionnoj (ili - otricatel'noj) - sobstwenno muzhchniny biologicheski nikogda ne byli osobenno zainteresowany w probuzhdenii seksual'nogo interesa u zhen. Palka eta - o dwuh koncah. Potom problem ne obereshsja. Tradicionno naibolee udobnym sostojaniem bylo - zhena moih detej rastit' doma, a dlja oral'nogo seksa - est' dewki w bane. Otsjuda i wseobshee tradicionnoe predpochtenie devstwennich dlja zamuzhestwa, ne goworja uzh ob obrezanii dewochkam lishnih chastej w Afrike. Chtob osobenno ne interesowalis'.

Kazhetsja Robert de Niro (kakoj-to italo-amerikanskij katolicheskij mafiozi odnim slowom) ne pomnju w kakom fil'me, w ob'jatjah u prostitutki na eto skazal pro zhenu i oral'nyj seks - Da tu chto, ona zhe etimi gubami moih detej celuet ! (i kazhetsja ego ruka potjanulas' k pistoletu).

Tot zhe wash geroj, esli by zhena prishla k nemu desjat' let nazad s raznoobraznymi predlozhenijami - mozhet i razwelsja by.

Tak chto muzhchiny - u nih interesy swoi w etom worpose. Nu i tut kak wsegda,
you win some, you loose some.

[azbukivedi.livejournal.com]

Очень интересный ракурс, спасибо. Хотя я предпочитаю обслуживать своего мужа сама. И он это тоже предпочитает - слишком брезглив для девок в бане.
А губы я помою. :))

Уточнение

[enot.livejournal.com]

Это был фильм "Analyse This", комедия о мафиози (Де Ниро), который обращается к психиатру с проблемами "на работе".

[phisteshka.livejournal.com]

ИМХО ищут проблему в голове (спасибо дедушке Фрейду) забывая, что сначала надо проверять самые простые версии.
Одна из - поясница - самое уязвимое место женской спины (у кого не болела - не стреляла?), пережатый там корешок - типа асексуальность в кое каком месте :).